BAD CHRISTMAS JOKES – Nick Jonas vs Caspar Lee


Nick: That’s just… that’s just… stupid Caspar: Hey my name is Caspar Lee, my BFF Nick Jonas happens to be in London Which is really exciting for me because I haven’t seen him in ages, and we’re really really really close friends We even have pet names for each other so my pet name is Jean… He always goes hi Jean!.. and I call him.. err I call him I call him..

Err.. I call him… MANDY! so I go, hi Mandy, and it’s really funny… show them the… the ermm *zooms into his armpit* Josh: The trees yeah, wow, it’s beautiful *Nick knocks* Caspar: Hey!! How is it going? Nick: Good to see you, how you been? Caspar: Yes, thank you for taking your time… Nick: Been a while, how are things? Caspar: Good good Nick: As always… yeah as always I came with a gift and especially you know that’s Christmas time, so just before we do anything else…

*Caspar is shocked and blessed* Nick: You definitely need this… Caspar: Really? Nick: Yeah Caspar: You always come with the best gifts I don’t have one for you, but I’ll get you one Nick: That’s fine. This is gift enough for me Caspar: Alright Nick: It’s important… seeing you happy Caspar: What are you trying to say?? Nick: I think you know what I’m trying to say Caspar: The loser has to wear this for a month Nick: I accept, I will not be losing today, you should know that Nick: I will not be losing! Shall we get to it? Caspar: I have a feeling you’re gonna be too good at this. Okay let’s do this Nick: I am going to look deep into your soul… Caspar: Please don’t… Nick: Why did Mrs Claus leave Santa? *intense stare* Caspar: Why? Nick: Because of his three ho’s…

Caspar: Okay okay Nick: Nailed it! Caspar: What do you call father Christmas in the beach? Nick: I don’t know what do you call father Christmas in the beach? Caspar: Sandy Claus… Nick: Interesting Nick: This is awesome – why is Santa’s sack so big? Just curious… why is it so big? It’s really… really big sack Caspar: *sighs* Why is it so big? Nick: It only comes once a year *Caspar dying on the inside* Caspar: What do you call the bankrupt Santa? Nick: A what Santa? Caspar: A bankrupt Santa… what do you call a bankrupt Santa? Nick: err… I don’t know… what do you call him? Caspar: Saint NICKel-less Nick: That’s just, that’s just stupid Caspar: Every time you hear your name you can’t help and laugh Nick: That’s just dumb, that’s bad, that one is bad Caspar: What is the score? Josh: You laugh every time… you’re losing, dramatically Caspar: okay 🙁 Caspar: Does my breath still smell? Nick: No Caspar: Okay good.. Nick: What do you say to Santa Claus when he’s taking attendance to school? Caspar: I don’t know what you say to Santa Claus Nick: presentsssss Caspar: Is that high pitch? The joke wasn’t even funny! Nick: Oh I just made it funny..

I learned a lot from Jack Black and Kevin Hart, the nuances of comedy – making unfunny things funny. The movie is funny Caspar: Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve? Nick: Err why does he? Caspar: Because it suits him ‘SOOTS’ him… Nick: Ahhhhh, that’s that’s good Caspar: You didn’t laugh :// Nick: What do the elves call it when Santa Claus takes his final bow? After a play because you know Santa Claus is a lot of plays movies and things were in his admiration What do they call that thing that happens? Caspar: I mean..

What do they call it? Nick: What do they call it? Caspar: yeah… Nick: Well of course they call it santa plause Got him… fuckin got him Caspar: Okay, I’m not gonna win this one But I’m gonna see if I can bring us something back Nick: If you get a genuine… Real laugh out of me perhaps You can redeem some of yourself for your loyal people online To not think you’re absolutely terrible at this Caspar: If I get a laugh out of this one, you have to hit the like button and subscribe Nick: Correct. It’s a nice tree you got here is it real? It doesn’t smell real.

Caspar: No It is a real plant I don’t know if we have the same Christmas tree. Nick: I think you guys are full of shit Caspar: What do you get when you cross Santa with a duck? Nick: Santa with a duck? I don’t know… Caspar: a Christmas quaker(cracker)-quack-quack Nick: *saying under his breath* It is so dumb… wowwwwww Caspar: Do you like that one?! Nick: That was good… …but you have to wear the thing on your head Caspar: I really appreciate you coming here and delivering me that deodorant Nick: That was fun Caspar: I didn’t need that a lot of people have been telling me about my… err Nick: You do smell fuzzy… and thank you for my tree Caspar: Sure you want to take the tree all the way back to the US? Nick: Yeah I don’t mind I’m a pretty good with trees. Yeah black trees in the jungles of Jumanji Caspar: All right…

oh that’s your movie! Nick: That’s my movie… Caspar: I’ll go check it out! Nick: Go see it! Caspar: Will you come with me? Nick: wear those antlers! Caspar: All right! Nick: All right… Caspar: Okay… Caspar: You gonna come with me to watch it? 🙂 Nick: Nope Caspar: All right… 🙁 Fuck… I feel like he just came to my house to steal a Christmas tree.

As found on Youtube